happiness.

i'm lacking it.

i've just been in this super weird funk as of late, and......

well.

it sucks.

because of this funk, i have:

-not yet finished my internship apps

-decided to not pursue KKPsi this semester (despite having rushed it)

-not been sleeping or eating well

-been generally unhappy (despite being surrounded by people who really care about me)

the one thing bothering me the most about this funk is that last point.

i am kind of bummed about KKPsi, but it's better that i decide not to do it this semester.

i want to fully enjoy the process of becoming a "brother" (it's a co-ed music frat)....this semester is already too chaotic for me to fully enjoy it.

anyway, that last point......

i am surrounded by people who love and care about me, but like.....

that only makes me a little happy.

i'm glad i have them, but i'm not 100% happy with myself.

i'm 100% thankful and glad i have them.

i just don't 100% like myself.

this is probably just a seasonal thing.

winter sucks.

oh my goodness.

really really really quick post, because i'm in the middle of reading Benjamin Franklin's biography for American Literature.

(i really prefer early British Literature to early American Literature. i'm sick of historic documents and religious nuts, and Ben Franklin, even though he's a cool guy. it's just REALLY long. i'd rather read Chaucer.)

ANYWAY.

DaveyDanceBlog.

i just need the world to know.....

I LOVE IT.

for some reason, "All Nighter '09: DaveyDanceBlog #64" has been marked as not viewed.....

UNTIL TONIGHT.

HOLY CRAP.

WHERE HAS HE BEEN ALL MY LIFE!?!?!?!

soulmates?

dancing like a nut in public?

tight pants?

nerdy?

YES.

PLEASE.

LOVE.

i haven't been this excited in a very long time.

here is #64.

DaveyDanceBlog -64- NYC Union Square from Pheasant Plucker on Vimeo.

more Ben Franklin time.

i want to be as cool as Davey from now on.

a few things...

that have made me laugh on this really dark and dreary day.

1. middle of last week, i went to the band office to turn in my money/RSVP for the MRD Ball. i went with amanda, we turned our stuff in together. i even said hello to Connie (the secretary)! this past weekend, i turned in andrea's form with her money (which was actually my money. girl needs to pay me back. haha)....

i got an email from Connie today saying that i didn't pay. actually, there were almost 30 other names on that list, along with mine. everyone is like "wtf." right now.

my reaction: HAHAHAHA. OH GOODNESS. THEY WOULD.

i laughed a lot. it really shouldn't be that funny, but it is to me (the irony is killing me).

but yeah, i called Connie, was like "i turned it in with Amanda and i paid for Andrea...."

she looked them up, saw they paid, i told her that i had my money in an envelope folded with my RSVP....she said she'd be on the lookout for it (she didn't separate the money and forms....KKPsi did.) and marked me down as PAID, since i had witnesses.

i'm going to visit her tomorrow morning just to confirm. :]

it would happen to me. hahaha~

2. "you look a little too happy about skew." - my stats professor.

i was picturing a certain music major (codename: Squidward) shirtless during class.

luckily, i can sometimes be quick on my feet, and my professor has a sense of humor.

"i get it! skewed to the right means skinny on the right! skew. skinny. skew. skinny!"

but yeah. Squidward with his shirt off.....the only reason why i miss marching band. (but not the only reason why i miss hot weather. it's ass cold today AND dreary, AND we're under ANOTHER winter storm advisory. freaking a.)

3. my MRD Ball dress is beautimous. i'm very happy about it and very excited for friday evening.

4. i can play a scale on the flute!! learned B flat and C on monday night, the rest of the scale yesterday. i'm excited. maybe i'll try to get a practice room tonight or tomorrow afternoon for a little piano or flute time. (apparently we're not allowed to play in the dorms....even though our resident music major is allowed to.....and that the kids downstairs can blast their music as loud as they like. doesn't make sense, but whatev.) my pinky kind of hurts though. amanda's flute has open holes, so playing is a little harder....i'm doing pretty okay though!

5. "Vampire Weekend Lands First No. 1 Album"

that's all for today. :]

i think ur a contra.

and i think i fail at keeping up with this.

fall semester ended fairly well.

grades were only so-so, but i had a lot of fun.

[i'm writing this for my own health.]

i was really missing marching band up until yesterday.

we had rehearsal from 7-9 for the governor's parade tomorrow....

and we have rehearsal again from 5-7 today....

yeah.

i'm hella out of shape.

and still just as awkward as ever.

but....Vampire Weekend put out a new album earlier this week, so i've been pretty content.

i can't stop listening to it.

maybe i'll try really hard to keep up with this semester,

but with a lack of marching band,

my life is pretty boring.

i really should have recorded everything from last semester.

ahh, oh well.

what to do until rehearsal......?